By Andrew Bell

I was conscripted at 18 years of age. I can still remember my number by heart after 21 years. I was given an assault rifle and taught how to use it with lethal consequences. We were trained to be the best. Being the best meant being the deadliest.

I was the third generation of Bell boys to go to war. I use the word 'boys' as that is all we were. My father was a volunteer in World War II and saw action in the deserts of North Africa and the battlefields of Europe. My grandfather was also a volunteer who served in India and later in Europe during the 'Great War' of 1914-18. We were all given medals for our efforts.

My prayer is that my son or daughter will never experience the horror of war. I hope they never hold an assault rifle. My reasoning is quite simple. Regardless of all the good reasons we are given as to why a war is necessary, the experience of three generations of Bell boys is that war is a cruel, terrifying, deadly game of chess played by a powerful few. It always threatens the lives of millions who rarely understand and cannot escape its devastating impact. Wars are never won. They end when one side has lost everything and the other side has not lost as much.

Strangely enough I think I have much in common with the Iraqi soldiers who were willing to fight to defend a deranged dictator and his cabinet. I was brain-washed into believing that South Africa had to stop the 'rooi gevaar' (lit. 'red danger'), an Afrikaans term used to describe communist ideology being carried down Africa by the Russians and Cubans. The worst part of this ideology was the absence of God and as Christians it was our duty to stop this evil. So thousands of young South Africans left their homes to fight a holy war in the desert regions of South West Africa (now Namibia). We fought an enemy we didn't know but whom we feared. We were hopelessly out-gunned but we went anyway. We had little choice really. The hopes of the Christian West rested upon our shoulders. We were the last line of defence. Or so we were led to believe.

However just like me, the young Iraqis have actually fought to defend an oppressive, powerful and ruthless regime. History now records the crimes against humanity committed by the white South African apartheid regime that I fought to defend. In reality the atrocities that the minority Sunni regime of Suddam Hussein committed on the Shi'ite majority are no different. Like me, those young Iraqi's who were even willing to die to defend the regime were offered nothing in return except the glory of dying a hero. Their 'infidel' were the American, British and Australian troops and so they waged 'jihad' (holy war) against an evil enemy. They fought an enemy they didn't know but whom they feared. They were hopelessly out-gunned but they went anyway. They had little choice really. The hopes of the Arab world rested upon their shoulders. They were the last line of defence. Or so they were led to believe.

In an interesting twist of history, the Americans, British and Australians whose forebears joined my father and grandfather in the world wars are no longer viewed as honorable liberators by many. The Christian 'Coalition of the Willing' is in danger of being classified by history as the 'scourge of the world' just as Christian South Africa had been. Interestingly the Russians are now one of many voices that condemns the war.

Like the Crusaders, the traditionally Christian nations who are in danger of being condemned by history as the aggressors. Millions have already marched in their western cities to say as much. In the midst of it all, history is still being written. I wonder what will prevent the next generation of Bells from experiencing the horror of war? Unfortunately history alone does not seem to be enough. However I am convinced that if the soldiers who fought in the deserts of Iraq had truly understood the intricacies of the conflict, they would have laid down their arms and embrace each other rather than pulling the trigger.

Andrew Bell is Global Mission Secretary for the Presbyterian Church of Aotearoa New Zealand. He came to New Zealand from South Africa in 1996.