Families Commission Commissioner Sandra Alofivae talks about working with the Church to strengthen families.
Families and churches are as synonymous as daffodils and Spring. It would be difficult to envisage one without the other.
The Church and the Families Commission have a common perspective - both want families to “be the best that they can be”.
How can we work together to achieve this?
The Commission earlier this year hosted a workshop with Christian leaders from different denominations to hear their views on what’s important for families. The Presbyterian Church was represented by then-Moderator the Right Rev Pamela Tamkersley and the Rev Maua Sola.
As a fellow Presbyterian, I came away from the workshop with renewed energy and zest for what the Commission is doing and the opportunities there are to combine our efforts with those of churches.
More recently, a great deal of the Commission’s research, analysis and advocacy has centred on strengthening relationships, promoting the importance of parenting, and preventing family violence – all issues of concern to those at the workshop.
There was enormous good will and unity amongst the participants that together we could effectively raise awareness on these important issues and provide information to families that would be helpful. There are a number of ways this could be achieved both nationally and locally.
The common lectionary calendar is a powerful document in that it sets the agenda for the preaching year. It provides a guide of suggested readings. The lectionary calendar has included in it important dates of international and ecumenical celebrations as well as days of remembrance.
Imagine the power across Presbyterian congregations if, as a leadership stance, the Church made the decision to add two more dates to the calendar to show unified support for international Families’ Day (15 May) and White Ribbon Day (25 November), which is when people wear a white ribbon to show they don’t tolerate family violence.
The Commission has been promoting and encouraging support for international Families’ Day – 15 May – for the past two years. We see it as a great opportunity for society and individuals to focus specifically on families and look at ways in which they could do things differently to support them. For example, we encourage employers to think about offering flexible work options to help families meet some of their commitments. Families’ Day can also give people an opportunity to do something special with those who are closest to them. We’d like to see Families’ Day on the annual calendar (and the lectionary calendar) and given the same prominence as Fathers’ Day and Mothers’ Day, but without the same commercial overtones.
The power of the preached Word is significant and transformational – we’ve seen it and felt it.
The Presbyterian Church could lead the way in using International Families’ Day as the inspiration of a sermon or two leading up to 15 May. What a great opportunity to once again promote the values and strengths that sustain strong families and healthy communities. The second week of May could also become the time to pass on information on the activities and support that are available to families from churches and in the community. Churches could also use Families Day to encourage others in their towns and communities to consider what they can do for families.
White Ribbon Day – 25 November – is a date that a growing number of churches are using as a focal point for discussion on the serious issue of family violence. White Ribbon Day and the days leading up to it are a time when people, particularly men, wear a white ribbon to show they don’t tolerate violence against women. In New Zealand, most violence against women takes place in the home and many organisations and communities use White Ribbon Day to raise awareness of family violence and the importance of asking for help. Family violence affects many Kiwi families and a growing number of churches are now hosting and taking part in White Ribbon Day activities. It would be wonderful to see and hear church leaders from around New Zealand all speaking out about family violence in November.
The Commission’s website at www.nzfamilies.org.nz has more information. Anyone wanting to give us their views directly on specific family issues can join our online panel, The Couch at www.thecouch.org.nz.
There is a lot of work to being done in New Zealand to support and strengthen families and the Families Commission is committed to doing its part. We are keen to work with communities and organisations throughout New Zealand – together we can make a real difference.